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The Hardest Decision
It's about the inner struggle, I battle everyday
The voices in my head, will they ever go away?
It's the first thing I think of in the morning,
And the last thing at night,
Friends try to understand, but instead, all we do is fight.
You think you're in control,
And your secret's well hidden,
When in fact you're BEING controlled,
Because food is forbidden.
Friends and family watch you suffer,
Teary-eyed and distressed,
While you feel upset and guilty,
For causing this horrible mess.
Your body begins to shut down,
Your "monthly visit" ends,
And when you try to run,
Your body only descends.
To the ground you fall,
With no one as a witness,
You thank your lucky stars,
As it's none of their business.
Your new attitude: irritable and rude
Friends ask you to come out, but you reply: "I'm not in the mood."
Socially withdrawn, drowning in your own thoughts,
Your body cries for help,
An internal war is being fought.
Days go by, each one worse than the other,
Until things get out of hand,
And you eventually blow your cover.
Next thing you know: psychiatrists, doctors and nurses,
And all that's emitted from your mouth is foul language and curses.
Who is this strange person, occupying your body and mind?
No one knows, but down the spiral you further wind.
Faster and faster, you continue to decay,
Before you know it, you're losing a pound a day.
Finally one day, your path breaks,
And your fate is decided, which choice do you make?
Slowly and painfully, continue to fall,
Or turn things around, and get back on the ball?
This will be the hardest, most important decision to get by:
Will I live,
Or will I die?
Reprinted with Permission.
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