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Poetry :: Articles :: Caron
In Their Words

All poems that appear have been submitted and reprinted with the permission of the authors. Copyrights are retained by the original authors and you must contact them for permission to reprint. If you have a poem you'd like to submit yourself please send it to POETRY@something-fishy.com

by: Biggie

you learn to test your limits, to ignore your screaming, crying, dying body to ignore the truth,
b/c it hurts
it's rational
and it makes sense...but it's not you. it's everyone else, and your not everyone else god damnnit....your different.

for a moment you get scared, when your heart is pounding so fast and so hard that it feels like it is going to leap out of your chest, like it is going to explode,
but then you sit back and say "oh well."

you get really good at lying to yourself.

you become invincible.

everything closes in around you, you focus on one thing only

your down sizing, literally and figuratively

worrying about just one thing

living and dying, eating and starving, existing and not existing you don't talk to people anymore, all lines of communication atrophy along with a large section of your braing

you can't focus, can't write, can't remember what it used to be like can't laugh, can't cry, can't create, can't understand anything nothing makes sense....your numb from the inside out
it leaves you cold...

it's all a big mess.

you step into the looking glass and begin to fall
fall away from the world
fall away from reality
fall away from love, life, and hope

and fall apart

you lose yourself and you become anorexia....

plain and simple.

death by starvation is not pretty...

it's slow, scary and lonely.

and it hurts.

a lot.

©2001 Biggie. Reprinted with Permission.

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