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Between Life and Death
by: Kyah

I am standing on the rocky edge of life
I know the daring rolling waves will crash unto my crumbling ledge.
My limp body will tumble and fall like a rag doll: waiting.
Waiting for the ocean to suck me under, to smother my breath.

I am standing on the thin line of myself and nothingness, life and death.
My heart is of lead, my mind of poison.
Each day passes, I go unnoticed in a busy world.
My words, so useless, my voice, a petty distraction.
My memories blur in an endless mesh,
Names I cannot recall, special moments I cannot trace back.
Did someone call my name?
No, no, it was just the whistling wind, teasing me as usual.

There is an end of the universe and I am floating above it,
Waiting to Disappear
I am neither good, nor bad.
I receive not a scowl, nor praise.
A girl flicks a smile my way, but a loud, obnoxious girl
Tromping her boots behind me is the receiver of such a treasure.

Can anyone see me?

The days turn into nights.
Streaming from my eyes are endless trails of dried tears.
My head screams and sobs, though not a sound passes over my lips.
My heart pounds at my rib cage,
Beating at it as though trying to escape my body,
To leave my worthless soul.
Food, a life giving essence, I dare not eat.
I push my food around my plate
As if the plate was a clock and I was trying to turn back the time,
To a complete standstill.
A standstill: To get up and leave, to Disappear
A standstill: When I Disappear beneath the hungry, rolling waves

©2000 Kyah Hollen. Reprinted with Permission.

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